LOLSaints

I can has surgery?

Tobit is blind, because birds pooped in his eyes (we're not making this up). Also, he lost all his money as a penalty for keeping to the strict Jewish Law, despite the commands of the Assyrians. He bewails his lot and prays for God to strike him dead.

Tobit suddenly remembers some money that he gave to a friend of his long ago to safeguard. He decides to send his son, Tobias, to fetch it; if only they can find a guide who knows the way to the city where his friend lives. Lo and behold, a providential stranger appears at the front door—Raphael, of course—who happens to know the way. He agrees to guide Tobias.

Along the way, Tobias catches a fish when it tries to swallow his foot. (Again, not making this up.) Raphael advises him to save the heart, liver, and gall bladder of the fish. Burning the heart and liver will cure a person who is being afflicted by a demon—just in case Tobias happens to run into such a person—while the gall bladder will cure blindness.

After some drama involving a demon, grave digging and a wedding, Tobias and Raphael return successfully.

Tobit's blindness is cured by the gall bladder; and his fortunes are restored. Everyone lives happily ever after.

To catch all the excitement of the journey and find out how birds pooped in Tobit's eyes, crack open your bible to the book of Tobit, right between Nehimiah and Judith.